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Florida does not host many Sci-Fi, Comic, Toy, or Pop Culture Conventions.
It has two main ones, in Orlando: FX and Megacon. Both these shows occur about the same time, once a year. Usually around January or February.
This is unlike California or NY which seem to host one every month it seems.
Being a fan, I do not mind this. Once a year I make my trek, fill in gaps in my various collections, meet a few D-list celebrities, and on the rare occasion, get to hang out with a childhood icon. My favorite pastimes though, are dork-watching and anime catgirl-counting. My NOT-SO favorite pastime is stink-avoidance. This is what I wish to address here.
Now listen, I understand your nature. You have pasty white skin, due to your avoidance of the sun, being that you live in your mom's basement or above her garage. You are not used to being around so many people, since you spend all your time online playing WoW. That's okay. Every society needs its Morlocks.
But com'on... it's only once a year. Would it kill you to shower for your yearly trip to the surface world?
What? You say that like Samson, your entire HALO fragging l33t skills, and comic minutia reciting powers lay in your unwashed greasy long hair? To this I counter, all your no-girl getting skills also reside within that Crisco covered coif.
I know your mom buys all your stuff for you; your tighty whitey undies don't restock on their own. I bet if you checked the bathroom (that's the "Reading Room" to you) you'll see she's also stocked up on Suave shampoo hoping to get you a girl one day so she can get you the heck out of her house. So no excuses.
Let me put this in a way you'd understand:
You're the Moleman.
You want to get with Sue Storm?
Become Reed Richards.
It has two main ones, in Orlando: FX and Megacon. Both these shows occur about the same time, once a year. Usually around January or February.
This is unlike California or NY which seem to host one every month it seems.
Being a fan, I do not mind this. Once a year I make my trek, fill in gaps in my various collections, meet a few D-list celebrities, and on the rare occasion, get to hang out with a childhood icon. My favorite pastimes though, are dork-watching and anime catgirl-counting. My NOT-SO favorite pastime is stink-avoidance. This is what I wish to address here.
Now listen, I understand your nature. You have pasty white skin, due to your avoidance of the sun, being that you live in your mom's basement or above her garage. You are not used to being around so many people, since you spend all your time online playing WoW. That's okay. Every society needs its Morlocks.
But com'on... it's only once a year. Would it kill you to shower for your yearly trip to the surface world?
What? You say that like Samson, your entire HALO fragging l33t skills, and comic minutia reciting powers lay in your unwashed greasy long hair? To this I counter, all your no-girl getting skills also reside within that Crisco covered coif.
I know your mom buys all your stuff for you; your tighty whitey undies don't restock on their own. I bet if you checked the bathroom (that's the "Reading Room" to you) you'll see she's also stocked up on Suave shampoo hoping to get you a girl one day so she can get you the heck out of her house. So no excuses.
Let me put this in a way you'd understand:
You're the Moleman.
You want to get with Sue Storm?
Become Reed Richards.
