8.28.2007

The Plight of the Strong Black Woman

Anyone that knows me knows I have a great dislike for political correctness.

I mean, what happened? One day a switch was flipped and everything I knew was now offensive to one person or another. But the day before, it was fine?

So anyway, being that I much prefer the political UNcorrectness of yesteryear, I thought I'd talk about one of my favorite comicbooks of all time...

"Superman's Girlfriend, LOIS LANE"  (Mar/Apr 1958 - Sep/Oct 1974)
 
The title says it all.
It's not "Lois Lane". It's not "Girl Reporter, Lois Lane" It's not even "The Amazing Sexpot, Lois Lane." 
No, it's "Superman's Girlfriend, Lois Lane".
 
It seems Lois Lane only exists as the chick that dates Superman... no other reason to exist, yet she received her own comic series.

Granted the typical issues revolved around either Lois trying to get Superman to marry her, or Lois marrying either Satan, Bruce Wayne or some convict on death row... Yep, try publishing THAT today, my friends.

My favorite all time issue of this series is, of course :

Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane 106
Why is this my favorite? Just look at that cover!

That's right... LOIS TURNS INTO A STRONG BLACK WOMAN!

Actually, that's not entirely true. It's more like the the comic book equivalent of going black-face. 

Lois Lane wants to cover a story in the ghetto, but the African American folks will not talk to her because, and I quote "SHE'S WHITEY!"

So what's a reporter to do? Why, go to Superman and make him turn you black of course!

Because obviously, that's one of Superman's powers, you know. (He actually uses a Kryptonian machine he keeps in the Fortress, you know, just in case someone he knows ever wants to turn black.)

So a lot of social commentary stuff happens and at the end, just when you think you've been reading an issue of ANOTHER comic book, the real Lois Lane, the one I love, shows up and asks Superman to marry her.

Of course he says, "No." (As always.)

And Lois, being the investigative reporter she is, assumes that it's because she's black now.

Superman then gives her a verbal pimpslap and pretty much tells her to stop being stupid, and gives her the old tired "I can't marry you because my enemies would use you against me, blah, blah, blah..." excuse.

Like you'd expect, her blackness wears off at the end of the day, and she's back to being plain old whitey again.

But don't let the ending stop you from enjoying such gems as Lois's regular cabbie refusing to pick her up cause she's black, forcing Lois to -OH NO- ride the subway! That's worth the price of admission alone, my friends. So is her fascination with her brand spanking new "AFRO WEAR!"

You just can't make this stuff up.

So, for a taste of yesteryear with the stupidity of today, pick up this issue. I promise you, it won't disappoint.